Here is the paradox. In our Humility, we are Giants.

If you heard this often from a person you had a close attachment with in childhood:

“You’re so dramatic”

“Stop being overly sensitive”

“You’re so moody!”

“Smile, there’s no reason to be sad”

“You should feel x ... “

You’ll most likely have internalized a core message: 

“Some thing is wrong with the way I feel. 

Some emotions are bad and I shouldn’t have them.”

This is the beginning of the loss of connection to the authentic whole self. (#atmavidya) 

This is when we inherit someone else's "terms and conditions".

This is when the developing psyche is exposed (subconscious conditioning/subtle energy) and can be innocently (or maliciously) passed on from our family of origin and/or principal care providers. 

This is when we may adapt to cope and start denying, avoiding, and internalizing our emotions. Energy gets trapped and "The Body Keeps The Score".

We may unconsciously repress our somatic bodies true nature which is to express and release all energy in motion (eMotion)

We may become "dis embodied", "dis integrated", "fractured", "in complete" or otherwise "dis eased" from this externally conditioned and/or traumatic exposure whilst young. Everyone has inherited conditioning from their family of origin and everyone is on a spectrum of consciousness (aka "mental health") due to that early conditioning. 

Some become labelled by their unconscious patterns, others choose to raise and play with their "shadow" in a healthy "self healing" manner.

The psyche's shadow, which we all have, is NOT our enemy, repression or denial of it as it arises, is. 

 The shadow (our early conditioning) in itself is neither good nor bad, it is simply the cards we were dealt whilst growing and staying safe as a young one. 

If we deny the shadow or we get stuck in cycles of emotional reactivity and chaos, excessive stress, multiple failed adult relationships, addictions to anything to "get you through", sexual risk taking and promiscuity, self harm, suicide ideations and/or attempts or even criminal choices may indicate a wide spectrum of possible conditioning of the psyche in childhood.  

As adults we may then project, externalise and blame others due to these unhealed dis integrated psyches and possibly eventually become unwell, perpetually angry or violent or even labelled "dis eased" due to an inability to self regulate our nervous systems as adults.

These patterns also come with thoughts of self shaming.

As adults, we hopefully learn how to process the full spectrum of strong emotional states and learn to accept all of our emotions (energy in motion) without judgement. 

Anger is perfectly acceptable, violent choices of behaviour driven by that energy are not.

Grief is normal, sadness is Ok, do not label these "lesser" or "unacceptable" energies.

An inability to feel energy in the body (emotion) or a perpetual disembodied happiness (spiritual bypass) or constantly masking authentic somatic energy (stress) becomes debilitating as you are out of alignment with your true feelings. 

Sustaining that inauthentic facade is tiring and may eventually lead to more serious health issues. 

The Somatic Body Keeps The Score of All Energies In Motion. Always. 

If you’re new to this practice this looks like becoming conscious to your ingrained and ancient thought patterns and how often you’re talking yourself out of an emotion or dismissing your own emotion.

You can also practice becoming aware of your own unconscious denial of other people’s emotions: “it’s not a big deal” or “get over it” or "stop being so sensitive". This can  also be called bullying, projection, gaslighting or simply denial of another's lived experience. Be extra aware of your own somatic responses to your own and other's energy and choices. Now, as an adult, Meet the energy where it is at. Meet fire with fire, asshole with asshole and do not become a sponge or doormat for other's possibly dumping their unhealed energy on you. As you may have learned for somatic survival reasons in childhood. 

What we do to self, we do to others. 

Hurt people, hurt people. If unaware. 
Assholes hurt people even when aware. 

Remember all emotions (energy in motion) are healthy.

All emotions are valid— wanting to be witnessed without judgment, without labels, without Self shaming. 

Be gentle on your Self. 

Forgive with compassion. Your Self firstly. Then others. 

Remind your Self of the inner growth and healing journey. 

You may feel the energy in the moment intensely, but you can still choose to hold it lightly. Be aware of your breath, re centre, re ground and slow down. Breathe even more deeply. 

Do not CHOOSE a behaviour or words in the heat of the moment that you may regret later. It is always more discerning and kinder to simply walk away if you feel out of alignment with Self or excessively triggered by disparate energies that insult your soul. 

Now as a grown ass adult, who realises for them Self, you always get to choose to protect your own energy with appropriate boundaries from those who may still have their own inner shadow work to hopefully also play lightly with. 

Be Your Own Best Self, your absolute birth rite and freely available in this moment. And The Next. And The Next. You may simply have forgotten who you have always been. 

Welcome Home. 

#atmavidya Is Whole and Here Right Now

Realise for Your Self, simple, free and liberating. 

Listen with the whole body as energy speaks clearly if we are paying attention,

With Amazing Grace