Step Off The Mindless Hamster Wheel, Stop The Burnouts and Throwing Up Rocks in A Vacuous Cloud of Dust. Slow Down To Grow Up. Concurrent Presence, Purpose, Grace and Kindness.

We Have All Been Conditioned By Our Family of Origin. Accept That Fact and Life Opens

If you want a fake friendship, ignore your own needs and be a people pleaser.

If you want an acquaintanceship to remain superficial, ignore your own core values and discerning intuition. 

If you want a fake relationship, avoid conflict.

Be authentic, be centred and grounded in knowing what's best for your peace and growth. 

Walk away from events. people and locations that repeatedly violate your stated core values and/or boundaries. If you want a real relationship, learn to listen and respond, concurrently, during times of activation. That is being a grown ass adult who knows who they are, what they deserve and has the space to hold another safe at exactly the same time. 

Don't like whiners and whingers and moaners and chaos drama creators? Leave the room. 

Don't like gambling or cigarettes or drugs or drunks? Stop frequenting places they are used. 

Don't like dogma, shepherds, controllers or preachers? Create a different choir with new songs!

Don't like caged animals, ring masters with whips or clowns? Stop going to the circus.

Don't like drama, get yo self a Llama.... 

Know Drama, Llama! 

But you get the picture....

Exit stage right, leave gift wrapped in the box what is not meant for you and be even more aware in that newly created space. Just because you choose to grow does not mean what you leave in your wake is bad. Life is not black and white, life's palette is far more subtly nuanced with infinite shades and endless highlights. Leaving behind a place, person, event or experience means it has served a purpose, or has gifted a new way of being or it has taught you something you didn't know before.  Now it is time to move on with thanks and fond memories. The best time to leave is when growth stops or the place has become too dense. But first be a connected, committed resident not simply a by passing gypsy tourist. Put down some roots and really taste and create in the community. Then after this real life sample, the place or people or experiences may no longer remain aligned, kind or adding anything to your journey. Time to Shift. The 23rd repeat ride on the Disneyland Community roller coaster may still be fun, but you may also be immune to that adrenalin rush or feeling decidedly sick by now. 

Never be afraid to give up the fleeting fun of a roller coaster to go for the grounded sustainable great. 

You have to choose what you don't want (permanently) firstly, so get off your dumb ass and stop riding those lame ponies. Unless you like lame. And dumb ass. 

When you choose what you don't want you become more discerning. 

You stop the comfort and convenience of fast food or fast living or fast play hard work hard and all you can stuff in the moment by running around habitually with vacuous ponies and vacuous people. 

Once you slow down to grow up you leave behind the adolescent fantasy of life being all beer and skittles... and roller coaster endless party central back pack the world with absolute freedom and no disciplines or roots. You may even have created your own children by now. That's when a whole new definition of unconditional love really kicks in. For most. Some still wanna be The Play Pen Babies them self now as parents. No wonder their kids, enabled by parental attachment wounds and patterns, turn out to be entitled loafers still living at home without individuation well into their 30's. Whatever happened to initiation into adulthood and modelling age appropriate personal responsibility by mentors and role models aka parents? 

Like autumn, like sunsets, like life, let go and let the dead leaves drop. 

Prepare the soil, plant new seeds, water well and simply be patient for the warmth of spring. 

Learn how to honour both your own experience and your family of origin and/or partner’s and children's ... at the same time. This is about relating with and aligning and listening to a diverse range of other humans without accepting anything that does not align for you. 

Learn to fully feel what you are feeling while simultaneously holding space for beloved others to fully feel what they are feeling, too. This is the gift of attuned inner space. A healthy attachment style formed in childhood and modelled by conscious (not perfect) parenting. 

Make space for how the other is seeing/describing things even as you continue to hold space for your own “version of truth.” There are almost 8 billions humans on earth and that is how many perspectives exist. No one else has your unique DNA and/or insights of lived experience. Honour and be aware of that diversity BUT do not accept any core values that do not ring true for you. 

I know that is not easy, which is why we may run from differences in relating or choose to not even visit those countries that are diverse or in conflict with your values. 

Do I want to even visit a country that dishonours women or violates basic human rights? 

Hell to The Fuck No. 

Do I wanna hang around drunks or whining lushes or moaning drama infused addicts? 

Hell To the double Fuck No. 

Do I choose to relate with someone who can't or won't listen or is so narrow minded and stuck on their entitled ways they think to be right is more important than to be kind? 

Hell to the triple FUCK no!

We far too often expect to be seen and heard before we are willing to see and hear.
Yet we cannot receive a love or viewpoint or be open to the new if we are not willing to offer.

To be interesting you need to be interested. 
The friendships you create are not the ones you’ll never fight with. Same with a conscious partner. 

In fact trusted friends call you on your small minded bullshit and then listen some more to said bullshit. 

It’s the ones who are willing to stay grounded with you when things suddenly turn shitty. The one's who are willing to mutually reciprocate and take radical ownership of their small ego part in adding unnecessary drama to shit-fires. Those who can as grown ass humble adults say, “I realise my part in this. I miss you. I will do better to listen. I'm sorry. Let’s figure this out together.” Changed behaviour is the real test of growth, not just hollow apologies and blah blah blah of more wafted vapours. 

Especially any blah blah advice coming from unqualified coaches and relationship churners and drama addicts or lush drunks of where you have already been and know you don't wanna be again. 

Those with a safe limited lived experience of what a fully alive and committed full freedom to safely be you relationship feels like are only dreaming all in their heads until they have grounded it and felt it and lived it by getting their ass kicked in the Full Spectrum Fierce and Firey Life Arena. Listen to Those Who Have Presence and Are Modelling Being, not those who sit safely stuck inside small comfort boxes trying to do. 

Only YOU can choose what aligns for you. 

Stay grounded in the connection with the true self from moment to moment. 

Tune into your station clearly, eliminate even subtle static and keep your own receptive channels open

Or settle for being told what to do and how to love and live by someone else's TV mass media, social media, external self help advice and dogmatic terms and conditions of comfortable external validation and wishy washy anaemic co dependency. How swampy does that fun sound? 

Thanks for the offer, But No Thank You.

Know your self, know what you don't want, know what you deserve, trust what you feel in your gut. Then discerningly, from moment to moment, choose and create your best inter dependent sovereign life and share and commune in like minded aligned and kind community.